i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Sorry about my life...
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Randomize
