Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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