I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
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