Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
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Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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