dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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