im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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