dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Houston, we have a blender
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Randomize
