Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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