I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
