the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize