How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
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