she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
She needs sedatives and a leash
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
