I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize
