Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize