just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize