i just had sex bonerless
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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