he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
