I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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