We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Randomize
