I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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