He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
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