Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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