How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Randomize
