STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
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