would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize