I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize