Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
