Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
