It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
