New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
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