We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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