please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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