I want to have your abortion
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
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