Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
