the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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