U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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