i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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