Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize