I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize