I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
