I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
well most of my day revolves around power hour
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
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i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
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We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.