Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
