Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize