I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize