I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize