Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I party with great urgency now.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
