yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
