he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
