New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
