we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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